Q: Our son is starting at a new school for grade 7 this September, and they’ve emailed us a very long list of specific school supplies to buy. If I buy everything on the list, he’ll have paper and pencils for the next 10 years! How can I avoid spending more than we can really afford?

A: For many parents, the only thing that ruins a summer faster than kids who complain about being bored is thinking about how much they need to spend on back to school shopping. In fact, retail sales for the back to school shopping season closely rival Christmas and holiday spending.

What We Need vs. What We Want

September isn’t only loaded with feelings of hope and anticipation, but also with the familiarity of traditions and getting back to normal routines. However, getting back to normal shouldn’t be about buying everything new. This is a great time to evaluate our own attitudes towards what we need and want; what others, including advertisers, schools and friends, tell us we need; and how much we allow others to dictate our spending choices.

There are certain school supplies that need to be replenished each year so that kids have what they need. Binders, paper, pens, pencils, and art supplies just to name a few. As kids get older, there may be specific electronics, musical instruments or sports equipment on the list as well.

Find Out What He Needs, Set a Budget and Stick To It

Set a budget for what you’re able to spend and then ask your son to help find ways to get what he needs while sticking to the budget. This may include recycling some supplies from last year, watching for sales or waiting to buy items until they’re actually needed.

If there are items on the list that you’re just not sure about, wait to buy them until after you can touch base with his teacher. If they’re expensive, this also gives you a bit of time to save up for them. Part of being a critical back to school shopper is really questioning your motivation for buying what you’re buying. Ask yourself if you’re falling for the advertising hype, bowing in to peer pressure or just doing what you’ve always done. All of these can lead to spending more than you really can afford.

Laying Down the Foundation of Your Son’s Financial Skills

As you make your decisions, talk to your son and help him understand your reasoning. Right now it’s just about school supplies; later it’s about cars, mortgages and other large expenses.